Sanctimonia Binocs, Bhubaneswar, 3 May 2025
Hark! A tremor of unease has rippled through the serene heart of Sanctimonia. Our benevolent (and occasionally bewildered) king, fresh from his sojourn in the super capital, now finds a new cause for royal consternation. Whispers, carried on the wind like nervous prayers, speak of a new place of worship that has sprung up in the neighbouring lands, a bold edifice that… dare we say it… mimics the glory of our Holy Triad.
Oh, the audacity! While reason dictates that no mere mortal construction could ever truly replicate the divine essence of our sacred deities, the very notion has sent a shiver down the collective spine of Sanctimonia. This new temple, erected with considerable earthly funds in a land known as Digha, reportedly houses likenesses of Lord Jagannath, Lord Balabhadra, and Goddess Subhadra – a mirroring that has caused more than a few pious eyebrows to arch in suspicion.
The custodians of our own revered Puri Temple, the very wellspring of our spiritual identity, have issued stern pronouncements, cautioning their brethren against lending their sacred services to this imitation. Learned scholars and venerable servitors have even questioned the audacity of referring to this new establishment as a ‘Dham,’ a title traditionally reserved for the holiest of Hindu sites, our own Sanctimonia being a jewel in that divine crown. The architectural audacity of this new temple is also a point of contention. Built in the Kalingan style, much like our ancient marvel, it rises to a considerable height, a blatant attempt to emulate our grandeur. Yet, whispers abound regarding the very material of the idols – stone, they say, not the sacred neem wood that cradles the very essence of our Daru Brahma. A fundamental difference, a sacrilege in the eyes of the devout.
Beneath the veneer of theological debate, a more earthly concern simmers. Could this new temple, easily accessible to throngs of pilgrims from the neighbouring land, siphon away the lifeblood of Sanctimonia’s spiritual economy? The flow of devotees, particularly those from the west, is a vital artery for our city, sustaining countless livelihoods. The fear of dwindling footfall casts a long shadow over the bustling markets and humble lodgings that surround our original shrine.
Our king, ever attuned to matters of both the divine and the domestic (especially when they intersect with the royal coffers), is reportedly in deep contemplation. Will he issue a royal decree denouncing this imposter? Will he dispatch emissaries to the neighbouring land to subtly (or perhaps not so subtly) remind them of the pre-eminence of Sanctimonia? Or will he, with a sigh and a roll of his royal eyes, simply add it to the ever-growing list of Sanctimonian anxieties?
The holy triad themselves, though their expressions remain eternally enigmatic, are surely aware of this burgeoning imitation. Do they view it with divine amusement, a cosmic jest? Or does a flicker of celestial concern ripple through their serene countenances? We, the faithful of Sanctimonia, can only watch and wonder, clinging to the unwavering truth that while imitation may be the sincerest form of flattery, the original, divinely imbued heart of our faith resides, and will forever reside, within the sacred precincts of our own beloved Sanctimonia. Let the replicas rise and fall; the true beacon shines ever bright.
